Amazing is the only word I feel like describes my summer. I went into this summer with so many hesitations and concerns and I ended my summer on such a positive note and feeling like those worries were ridiculous. I mean, in reality they were, but change is something that I face so often you would think I would be awesome at it, instead it is something I have come to fear-I think because I am in constant change and it is starting to scare me how nothing in my life is very stable. But starting off the summer in fear that neither of my stone pillars were going to be at camp for the full summer/at all was the one thing I think I was most afraid of. Turns out beaks worked at camp all summer and it was the best thing I could have asked for. Things with her are just easy and honestly, I don’t know what I would have done without her on the certain days that she just knew I needed a drive around the lake or to just have a hug [even though she is not the huggy type..] then there was the people who I was surprised to see at camp, ryy and brisca. It amazes me how sometimes you never ever skip a beat with people no matter the time in between seeing or talking to them, it is like there is the bond that no matter what, the time in between doesn’t matter and you can just be yourself and comfortable with them. I had so much fun with the two of them at camp. Ryann was at camp for session1 and we lived together-wtfff haha best thing ever. And brisca was there 4/5 and it was just amazing. I loved being able to have another support around and just being able to have an old friend who was able to come back home and enjoy everything camp has to offer without skipping a beat. It makes it easier for me to think about a time when I might not be able to come back and how easy it will be to hopefully jump back in for a week here or there… and I mean, this summer in general program wise for me was a complete joke, but I took it and went with it. It was: 1&2 middies 3-younger girl creation [aka stb because it was aca week and I was in creation a total of 30 minutes the whole week] 4-beach party 5-younger girl horseback riding [aka help sga canoe with their trip/die at the stables] and 6-mini camp/skytop all in all an interesting pick of programs to say the least, but I guess I just don’t care anymore about programs and was happy with living with friends and just not letting that stuff bother me.
Then there were the nights off and weekends and just hanging out and time with friends. And snuggling. My nights off this year were in all a blast. I don’t remember what I did the first week but 3-6 were filled with bar times and good dinners and just I dk it was fun. And weekends, well two of them were spent on eric’s boat which turned into drunken days and even drunker nights, including one where at dinner I spit all over eric brisca and beaks. Haha, classy I know. And just so much fun. I lost a lot of things this summer on those nights too and woke up never in my own bed…but I wouldn’t change any of those nights at camp.
Before the summer even started me and allie and mips went to booms a lot and we met some guys from around camp and we had a lot of fun. It was an interesting start to the summer especially when we found out a 23 year old boy was going to work at camp as the cook. Turns out, our new friends and him were besties. Haha, good joke for me it turns out. But anyways, I from the beginning was against being friends with him, with my history of boys at camp I didn’t want to start anything/any drama..well, what do you know-new boy that works at camp turned out to be probably the best person I met all summer. I am not going to lie, meeting eric and becoming friends with him made the summer so much better. He was just a great friend to have all summer and we will see where else that leads… but he was able to put up with all our stupid craziness and still wanted to hang out with us, so I couldn’t ask for much else..haha and he dealt with my stupidity while at booms, which lets face it I was a hot mess this summer…
Anyways, then there was the awkward times of your former campers being on staff and I mean, it usually wasn’t much of a problem because I am never super close with my campers but last year I got really close with 2 of my campers on middies and I knew they were going to be hired before they even did and I was super nervous going into the summer because I remember how much I wanted to be able to break that weird camper/counselor line and become “friends” with my former counselors. So I was just nervous for a lot of different reasons, but surprisingly enough and I was super thankful as well, but aside from a few rough patches, things went super smooth and I couldn’t have asked for 2 better friends. I guess I was so nervous because I know that they needed someone and I wanted to be able to be there for them without being seen as a boss type figure if that makes sense..and that transition from camper to counselor itself is a rough one and I just couldn’t be happier with the way things unfolded.
Leaving this summer was super awkward because of course I am sad to leave the one place I truly feel like I can be myself and have these people who will do anything for me, but it was just weird to say goodbye to some of these people. not to say that it isn’t always like that, but just because I felt like some of these relationships aren’t going to be the same once I spend the next 3 months in Alabama and then move back home. Not to sound skeptical, but I am just nervous that things will pan out like they did last year with T. and I think I am just afraid of getting hurt and losing people I care about. Not to say I think that I don’t have strong relationships with them, but just because I don’t want to lose these important people again. And this having no cell service and now no internet is not helping any. [I am so bored that I have decided to word document write this and will post it when the internet comes back!] I just feel beyond isolated sometimes here and it is hard…
Anyways, I am heading to bed because training is bright and early tomorrow and we are hiking to the falls. There is so much more I want to write about the summer, it just becomes so hard to put it all into words sometimes..
me and beaks <3
me and macie
me cor and ry
1 comment:
i miss camp :(
and you too, my cracker crumbs. i'm sorry i didn't send you any letters this summer. things got a little crazy, and then the summer was over.
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