dreams and dogs.

I had a dream about Will last night. It was so real. We were talking and I told him what happened and he told me there was no way he would ever do that because of how much he loved everyone. And he told me it was all a lie. I just sat there and talked to him and told him how much i missed him and just seeing him really made everything better. He just told me it was all going to be okay. But I didn't understand how I was talking to him. And I just wanted answers to everything. But I didn't get them. He just kept telling me it wasn't true and that it must have been a bad dream. But I am awake, and he isn't here. I think I just want some answers. Getting a hug from him in my dream though was so real. I just want to know he is okay wherever he is. I miss him so incredibly much. It has been 8 months now and it still feels like I am living in a terrible dream. I just want to wake up and for him to be back.
Disney 2006 Senior Trip, plane ride home we sat together and had epic heart to hearts <3

At Graduation, him and Devon gave speeches :]


In other sad news, my puppy, Brandy who is 13 in human years and veryyy old in doggie years, she either has Cancer or something else, which I cannot remember what my mom said, anyways, she isn't eating and having a hard time getting around, so my pupperoo is most likely going to be put to sleep in a the next week or so. I absolutely hate that I cannot be there right now to give her another hug. My poor doggie. I absolutely love her even though she gave me a concussion and 2 black eyes when she was a puppy and i was 9. We've had her for as long as we've had Michael. I feel like they go hand in hand. I got a brother and a dog in one year. It makes me sad. And I talked to my dad on Monday when we found out and he just sounded devastated. =( I guess this just wasn't our year for animals...Alice and Trixie died last Spring, Lillie got attacked by the coyote/ big scary animal, Scarlet is no longer with us, SERIOUSLY, I started 2009 with 6 cats and a dog, and soon I will only have 3 kitties =[ I am just sad about it. I called Ryan like hysterical the other night and he has no idea how to handle me when I am sad over the phone. So he came on the computer and tried to make me smile. And he loved her too, he always wanted to take her on a walk and stuff. I am just sad I won't have a dog anymore. =(

me and my pup just talking with each other, Christmas 2008

pupperoo christmas 2009